com·mit·ted
kəˈmitid/
adjective
past tense: committed
- 1.feeling dedication and loyalty to a cause, activity, or job; wholeheartedly dedicated."a committed reformer"
Truth is sometimes stranger than Fiction. There seems to be an Epidemic of Bastard People that apparently left their Parents too soon, giving them the Finger and in the meantime they were probably supporting them & giving them unconditional love no matter what happens or how they were being treated in return that leads to those same children growing up in Society thinking that every single person that they encounter is going to feel obligated to do this very thing. A false sense of security & expectation that people are going to, irregardless of the arrogance and abrasive behavior, that you are somehow obligated to include these people in your life in a way that they are apart of it and are seen as someone else's responsibility. As if they are entitled to blind unconditional love, respect (for...nothing!), just like what mom & dad were responsible for no matter what happens.These people that apparently NEVER MATURED BEYOND PUBERTY, are thinking that EVERYONE is mentally challenged in the same way- that they have the same hang-ups, complexes and issues as they were struggling with through actual interaction with people, participation & teamwork, and faced their own challenges (instead of hiding behind other people & blaming them) as they do. They refuse to evolve past this level of mental slavery & social awkwardness well into adulthood. They refuse to communicate 2-ways & then just expect other people to "psychically" hone in on what their problem actually "is".And it gets worse...They aren't capable of actually MAKING real friends & having healthy relationships not only because they don't want to play any sort of responsible role & care about another human being, they don't have the qualities they EXPECT from other people. Manipulation, scum-assed tactics, and emotional hostage are the only things they can do to keep a sick attachment going that this other person is "stuck with". People are not going to feel STUCK WITH healthy mutually caring relationships. Those are relationships that belong.
They continue on among other people that CAN make commitments in their own Life expecting everyone to be their friend, their baby sitter, their mama & papa, their SPOUSE. And then get disgruntled at everyone that has their own children, that gets married or even takes some kind of responsibility in their life in some way.
Just the thought of someone else making a COMMITMENT throws them into a jealous Midlife Crisis. Because apparently they don't expect to have to actually DEAL with their OWN challenges, or even LIVE their own LIFE.
They expect someone "else" to live their lives FOR them, instead of HAVING a life in LIEU of what others have going ON and making time important WITH each other when you ARE spending time TOGETHER. Constantly trying to find ways to run away from who & what is actually apart of THEIR OWN Lives.
No one "else's" life choices, perspectives, or moral compass should be interfering with or imposing on anyone else's. It isn't Personal to anyone else unless they are apart of your LIFE. It is unrealistic to expect a personal commitment from someone that YOU don't have the qualities necessary in return that you mutually expect. It is a waste of that person's time.
The ONLY thing possible between lives is the importance of the time spent between them unless you MERGE lives as in a Marriage, and people are a little "closer" by putting the role into being a close friend, or you grew up together as family. People compromise and sacrifice on a personal level when they get married. That is really all that can happen.
No one can LIVE your life FOR you. You can only receive the care, support & help along your Way (and everyone else also IS on their own Way...) when you ASK & APPRECIATE it, and when you CARE ENOUGH about your own problem to play the actual role in solving the "problem".
A solution isn't available when someone is not ready for solutions. If you have no respect for the person that you are laying guilt trips on they are not going to be CAPABLE of helping you and not capable of feeling guilty, maybe disappointed & concerned at most.
Guilt & Obligation are never a part of any real solution. People are happy to help people that ask, appreciate it & play the role in solving their problems.
Unrealistically walking around giving people the finger (just as you did your parents), and expecting unconditional love & respect (for nothing), expecting friends when you can't be one, expecting mama & papa to take care of you & live your life for you, and to be on the commitment level of a husband & wife from the average Joe that you interact with every day is only going to invite a rude awakening when reality hits hard and people snap out of it and realize that no one is OBLIGATED.
Feelings aren't yet involved enough to FEEL guilty...and that is a mutual responsibility. It doesn't depend on "them" & isn't "their fault".
You need to weigh your own options, not someone "else's"...
